It’s turned into a rainy day. The dogs and I beat the rain by 10 minutes, getting up early and walking at a brisk pace through the park. The leaves floated gently through the air until they found a resting spot on the trail.
When I walk or run with the dogs, I usually talk to them as if they were running partners and we were discussing current events, but not today. I gave them the occasional “good boy, Shane” or a “good girl, Zoey…WOULD YOU HEEL…PLEEEAAASE?!”. I was feeling more meditative and a bit “spent” for lack of a better word. It was a rough week and I don’t feel like running any marathon tomorrow.
The week has been both physically and mentally energy exhausting. Along with my body which is in semi rebellion mode (refusing to listen to the mental commands I’m sending), I had a wild dream where nothing made sense and it was all negative. In a nut shell, here it is:
1. My father almost falling down an embankment which DOESNT EVEN EXIST IN OUR YARD! 2. Pres. candidate Romney coming to our house (as if he was some life long friend…ummm NO!), going for a walk with my sister and brother in law then getting sick to his stomach all over the road. 3. I walked Romney back to our house only to find plastic tree limbs poking their way through our formal living room ceiling along with boxes and light bulbs and other stuff creating massive holes in the ceiling. 4. I didn’t know who to call and when I tried to get hold of Ted, I dialed the wrong number but the receptionist was feeding me suspicious information at the same time as talking to a nurse in their office. …which wasn’t even where Ted worked! I would be very scared to find out the interpretation of THAT dream!
The exhaustion, the physical discomfort of my body, the dream, a morning at Urgent care, other events this week that have left me burned out. I’m in a very bad place before a race. I’ve asked myself these questions and responded with these answers to try to get back into positive race mode:
1. You don’t have to run tomorrow, so why bother? Because I don’t have any other plans. Because I enjoy the feeling of accomplishment after a long run and especially a marathon. Because I signed up and I don’t quit.
2. What’s the worst that could happen? I run a really slow marathon because no part of me is feeling good enough to put it out there. AND…
3. Would a really slow marathon be SO bad? No, not so bad, at least I would be going for a run, over coming the hurdles and making it the the finish line…eventually.
4. *My Favorite Question and Answer: How do you know things are going to go so badly? I don’t. I’m being negative and need to snap out of it. Get in a POSITIVE mood since I’m running tomorrow any way. It doesn’t matter about the weather, it doesn’t matter about any pain (it will go away eventually), I’ll put one foot in front of the other and finish the race because I AM STRONG.
It looks like things are already getting better already. It’s cool. We like cool for running. The rain showers hold off until later in the day. 
Maybe I’ll have better dreams tonight. Maybe President Obama will visit but we won’t go for any walks and we won’t go into the formal living room. 
Here’s to all runners this weekend. Good Luck! Over come the negative and put your positive cap on. If you make it to the start, you’ll make it to the finish.
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